How Did Those 2018 Resolutions Work Out?

It's the end of the year and a time when many of us reflect on the past twelve months and think about how we did. Did we reach our goals? Keep those resolutions?

Confession time: I didn't!

My goals weren't huge. I even set short term, monthly goals, to try to make them extra-attainable. Yet honestly, I didn't meet almost any of them! Which is why I've been doing some research lately about how to successfully set and achieve goals.

There is a lot of information about how to make and keep goals out there. I found tons of articles from prestigious publications, psychology magazines and blogs. But the best information I got was by listening to Rachel Hollis's Rise podcast last week, where she interviewed a man named Brendon Burchard. He said something interesting that really stuck with me.

He said that most people make New Year's resolutions or set goals to correct something that they perceive is 'wrong' about them. They focus on a flaw they want to fix. Maybe they want to lose weight because they feel like they are too heavy, or they want to save money because they spend too much of what they earn.


If I understood him right, what he was saying is that resolutions often don't work because we start from a place of negativity, and it's no fun to work on something negative, so then we avoid it. He suggests we reframe our resolutions so we're working toward a positive goal. So instead of just saying we want to lose weight, maybe we set a goal of running a 5k race and trust that the process of getting fit will help us lose weight and get more muscle tone.  I want to cook a new healthy recipe a couple times a month is more positive (and realistic)  than I'll never eat pasta again. And when something feels positive and attainable, we're more likely to pursue it.

He also emphasized establishing habits rather than trying to change our behavior by sheer willpower. So for example, I struggle with staying organized. But rather than saying that in 2019 I will be more organized, which is vague and probably won't work, I am resolving to give myself fifteen minutes every morning to sit with my planner and make my to-do list for the day.


On thing I'd like to improve is my eating habits. But rather than just deciding to eat better, which I've done, and failed at, many times, I am resolving to keep a food diary for the first month of the year. It's one clear, positive action that I can do, and hopefully it will make me more aware of what I eat and steer me toward better choices. And if it helps, I can always continue the practice.


In the podcast, both Brendon Burchard and Rachel Hollis mentioned how important it is to enlist the help of others. So, for example, training for that 5k with a friend, family member or running group, increases your chance of success. Asking my husband to help get my son ready for school, so I can have some extra time in the morning to plan my day, will help me meet my organization goal. I am terrible at asking for help, and I think that is one place where I went wrong with my goals this past year.


So in short, if you want to achieve your goals, keep them positive, turn them into specific actions, and ask others to support you!

Have you been thinking about goals for the upcoming year? Do you have any tips or tricks you use  to make sure you meet those goals? If so, please share them in the comments!

Wishing you all a wonderful New Year!

To celebrate the new year, my Christmas Town book, Sleigh Bells in the Snow, (in which the heroine is very organized, by the way!) is on sale this week for $0.99. And all of the other 12 Days of Heartwarming Christmas books are on sale for that price too!



Comments

  1. I gave up on resolutions at the end of year quite a while ago. For me it works out better to work toward something when I see it's needed in my life. Hope to do the same for 2019--so Happy New Year everyone.

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    1. Hi Roz! Your approach makes sense. It sounds similar to last year, when I set monthly goals. My biggest struggle is managing my time to meet them. As a parent, I'm not great at setting aside time for myself. Happy New Year!!!

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    2. I am the same, Roz. I don't tend to do resolutions. I have enough organized writing goals (a whole year's worth of writing all planned out) that anything more makes me grumpy.

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  2. I like the positive approach you talk about. It's true that it's better to see a positive goal of a trip ahead, for example, and saving money for it than to focus on cutting expenses alone. My goal for today is getting ready for tomorrow. The holiday and having company are yesterday and I'm eager to get back to my work tomorrow, once I regroup. I have a feeling a lot of people are spending these final days of the year regrouping.

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    1. That is such a great example, Virginia, of saving for a trip or something we want or need, rather than just trying to cut costs. I am excited to get back to work too! I loved our holiday but I also love my work and my routines.

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  3. This intrepretation of resolutions really makes sense and is much more achievable. I’ve never been good at meeting my new year targets. Thanks for sharing this very helpful message! Happy 2019!

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  4. I'm glad the ideas seemed helpful, Janice! Its a subtle difference but it feels more do-able to me. Happy New Year!

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  5. I'm still not sure what I'm going to do. This year was...not a good one, to say the very least. I bought a planner to try to help with 2019 and it's holy-crap-overwhelming. So, right now I'm duking it out with myself. We'll see which one of me wins. Happy New Year!

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    1. Hi Liz, I'm having trouble with Blogger, I tried replying once before and I guess it didn't work? But if this is a second reply, that's why. I think planners can be overwhelming, so I really take mine a week at a time, with maybe some monthly goals, but I really focus on each week. I mean, I keep the big deadlines in mind, of course, and plan my writing time accordingly, but other than that I usually take time each Sunday to work out what I'll be doing for the next seven days only!

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  6. I've been chipping away on achieving the same resolution I made years ago. In the last couple of years, I've found out I made more progress than I'd realized. Making positive goals seems like a good idea.

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    1. Hi Callie! Thanks for the comment. It's so neat that you are making progress... isn't it a great feeling when you realize it? Looking back helps me realize how far I've come. Happy New Year! (And if this comes through as a second reply to the same comment, my apologies. Blogger and I are not getting along very well today!)

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  7. Claire, this is such a great post! I'm one of those people who like the idea of a new year and a fresh start. So it's not surprising that I love New Year's resolutions. In keeping with your post, it's interesting to think back about the resolutions where I've been most successful... They are always built on something positive that I already like to do - like running a longer race, or visiting a new place every month, or calling a friend/family member every week. The ones where I fail miserably are the ambiguous ones like "being more organized." LOL. I'm going to formulate mine this year according to your outline above.

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    1. Thank you, Carol! I love the whole fresh start thing too! It's been kind of a rough year and I feel like I really need it. I'm glad that the post was helpful...I hope those of us who enjoy resolutions can make some that we can comfortably keep! Happy New Year!

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  8. Sounds like great advice. I'm all for positivity. Happy New Year!

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  9. I rarely make resolutions, but I do set goals. At the end of the year, I decided how many books I'm going to write in the coming year...last year, I actually cut back from two 95K word books to one. :-) but this coming year, I've set my goal back to two books.

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    1. Oh, and I've committed to doing 100 crunches every day in January...we'll see if that one bites the dust. lol

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  10. I set goals for the new year, but they are not resolutions. My goal for 2019 is to get healthy. That will include being active and eating healthy. I have three wonderful grandchildren and want to be around to see them grow up. I do like this take on resolutions. It is much more doable. Being healthier will be baby steps.

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    1. Hi Carla, I really love your goal. It's mine too! I'm an older mom and I want to make sure I'm there for my son, so I need to eat well and get fit! I used to be very fit but I hurt myself pretty badly a couple years ago and never totally recovered my fitness. This is the year!! Best wishes to you!

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