Last night I had a feel good moment. See, I got home from work at 6:00. Helped make dinner. Cleaned up. Did homework with my eight-year-old. At 7:30, he asked me to take him to the skateboard park.
And I want him to stay my Little One.
I've already told him we'll go back tonight even though I know I'm opening the door to change. I have to open the door wide enough for his wings to spread, even though those wings will take him away from me.
"It's dark," I decided.
"It's a school night," I explained.
There's not enough time and I'm tired, I thought.
"Please," he said in that voice that is still squeaky and young.
Ten minutes later I'm sitting on a cement wall watching my son scooter (he doesn't have a skateboard) around the cement ramps and curves and jumps. I had a book in my purse, but I didn't get it out. I watched him instead.
My little guy is usually a diva. He cries when he falls; he gets mad when he fails; he complains if things don't go his way.
Last night he made friends with three older boys on scooters. They called him Little One. They showed him how to spin the bottom of his scooter while standing still. They let him join them albeit at a slower pace.
He thought he was 'really' something. He fell but got back up. If they did something he couldn't do, he willingly went off by himself. He didn't insist (only child syndrome) on giving orders.
Sniff.
He's growing up.
And I want him to stay my Little One.
Well, thanks a lot Pamela! Now I'm teary-eyed at my desk at work lol:) My son is only three and already he acts like he doesn't need mom anymore. I love he's independence, but it's tough to let go. I can't imagine when he's eight. Great post!
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Jen
Jennifer,
DeleteI've loved every year. At three, my guy sat in my lap every night and we watched a Thomas the Train video. At three, I was pulling him around the block in his wagon and he didn't even know he had wings to spread.
Pam - Okay, I'm sniffing, too. How wonderful that you made that time with all you have to do. And you know why - you see it happening and you won't miss a moment. My oldest boy turned 50 on the 16th. I didn't have him for those really early day - he was 10 when we got him. But I hardly remember the little kid. He's now giant, capable, and loving. I like to think we helped get him there. And little Mike is on his way! Hang in there - and keep your hanky handy. (Incidentally, mine is Mike, too.)
ReplyDeleteMike is the number two name in the U.S. I named him Mike because I've never met a Mike I didn't like, and since I teach school, that's amazing.
DeleteI wish I could meet your Mike. My parents got me at four days. I'm so blessed to be adopted. I had a fairy tale childhood.
Pam, I'm so glad you made the time to take him to the skate park and that you had this once-in-a-life experience to share--even if we all cry a little. These are the things he will remember when he gets as big as Muriel's son, and my kids. When I hear them reminisce about small moments I know we went out of our way to work into two busy lives, I know they didn't care that dinner was late or that I had dust bunnies under the beds. Letting go is tough.
ReplyDeleteEr, you still have dust bunnies under the bed LOL because you make time for friends like me. I had such a good time visiting with you last weekend. Can I come again?
DeletePam, your story touched my heart! Your son sounds as determined and brave as his mom :) He'll always be your little one. Remember that book- I'll Love You Forever ? I could never get to the end of reading it to my daughter without choking up. They do grow fast but your relationship deepens too as shared memories like the one at the skatepark accumulate.
ReplyDeleteOh, I love that book. I had it in the delivery room with me. And, arg, his room is already messy!
DeleteAww, what a beautiful moment with your boy. Love it.
ReplyDeleteGlad you stopped by, Syndi.
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