Making the Invisible Visible!


MAKING THE INVISIBLE VISIBLE
By Elizabeth Mowers

I know a lot of people set New Year's resolutions. Whether or not you set New Year's resolutions back in January, we're at the halfway mark for 2020 so now could be a great time to set some new goals. As motivational speaker, Tony Robbins, says, "Setting goals is the first step in turning the invisible into the visible."

There are so many articles and experts out there who can give you great advice on goal setting. I'm sure you've already read and heard the standard advice a dozen times before. Rather than reiterating what many of us have already heard, I'm only sharing a few goal-setting tricks that I truly love and live by.

What's my favorite author up to these days?


1. Successful people leave clues.

So true. I'm always watching to see what successful people are up to. I try to find one thing they are doing that works and then fit it into my plans. There is a successful cozy author I follow on Facebook whose career is about ten years ahead of mine. I love watching what she's up to because she gives me ideas of what I should be doing soon (book writing goals, marketing, social media). She also seems to have a healthy work/life balance. That's something I certainly admire and want to emulate too.


2. Set a deadline that excites you.
My cousin is an extremely goal oriented person and has the achievements to prove it. Twenty years ago she told me that she writes her goals every year on her birthday. I loved her idea! What better way to ring in a new age than by celebrating a goal achieved? It may not work for everyone but it certainly has worked for me and it gives me another reason to look forward to my birthday. My first and second books each took several years to complete but were both completed (and sent to editors) on my birthday. That feeling was better than all the dessert in the world.


3. Don't tell anyone your goals.
Say, what? I know this is the opposite of what experts will tell you but it absolutely works for me. A friend of mine was named the strongest man in Illinois several years ago. As you can imagine, it took an immense amount of physical training to win that title. He told me once that he doesn't tell anyone his goals. He said that once he shares, psychologically some part of him feels like he's already kind of achieved the goal. For him, he tells no one and then once the goal is completed, he's ready to share the good news. His advice made me think about goals I had set and failed to achieve. For me, the excitement of sharing the new goal with friends DOES kind of take away my enthusiasm to get cracking on that goal. I loved his advice and have been following it ever since.

Okay, I don't always keep my goals under lock and key.
I love sharing my goals with my husband.

4. Don't tell anyone your goals.
Okay, I know this is a reiteration but there is another reason to consider it. A lot of people, even the those who love you and want the best for you, can be discouraging without even realizing they're doing it.

Sara Blakely, the self-made billionaire who started Spanx, explained in an interview that she didn't tell ANYONE close to her about her Spanx idea until she had researched it, made a prototype, FLOWN TO CHINA TO MEET WITH A MANUFACTURER TO MASS PRODUCE IT, and had been working on the idea for over a year. She said she knew that her family and friends would lovingly remind her that she didn't know a thing about starting a new business and she didn't want to hear the discouragement. I mean...wow...that's a completely different approach than what the experts tell us but I love it. Seek out wisdom and solid advice but don't share your goal/dream/plan with JUST anyone.

Those are my favorite goal setting tips. What are your favorites? I'd love to hear what's working for you!



Speaking of goals, Paige, the heroine of my latest book is on a quest with a very important goal in mind too - to find the baby she gave up for adoption ten years earlier. She gets a little sidetracked, however, when she meets and falls for lovable Charlie Stillwater...

💗
“Thanks for dinner, Charlie.” Paige turned to leave, but he touched her shoulder, shifting to step in front of her.

“Why do I have the feeling I said or did something wrong?” he asked.

“You didn’t. I’m tired, but...”

“But?” he prodded.

“Charlie, I want you to know I had...” She knew she shouldn’t lead him on when she wouldn’t see him again. How could she explain what she was doing in Roseley or why she could never entertain a long-distance relationship with anyone here? Without mentioning Lucy or her past or why things were safest left a secret...she couldn’t.

“A fun time? I really hope that’s what you’re trying to say.” He blinked with the vulnerability of a child and eased into a sincere smile.

Paige’s shoulders softened. She warmed under his gaze, powerless to draw her eyes from his.

“Couldn’t you stay for a few minutes more? I’d really love to show you that view.”
💗


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Comments

  1. I don't think I actually set long term goals - not often. We're sailors, and we have intentions, not goals or plans. Since our lives on the boat are weather dependent, we have to be willing to change, and we have to be patient sometimes waiting for favorable conditions. For me, my goals have been more like that. There are a few long term wishes, most met by now, but they happened when conditions worked out.

    But maybe I'd have hit more if I'd set actual goals. Hmmm...

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    1. I understand. Before children, my husband and I owned a motorcycle. I used to check the weather by sticking my head out the window but quickly learned that you can't do that if you're taking the bike for the day. When my husband took a two-week cross-country trip, he planned the hours based on the weather. "Rains are coming in from the west. Heading north then." He did that every day, several times a day. He had a fabulous trip but his itinerary changed by the hour. You're right - you have to stay flexible.

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  2. This is so true, especially the part about Don't Tell Anyone.

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    1. It also helps you deliver a good surprise in the end, right? :-)

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  3. I am so envious of goal-oriented people. I'm always sidetracked. I loved this post, and I really like your excerpt!

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    1. Thanks, Liz! I regularly tell myself that I'm a work in progress! Ha ha.

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  4. I enjoyed the story so much, especially the delicious little twist. And speaking of twists, that's another reason not to tell people about goals. Sometimes a goal morphs into something a little different, and it's easier to be flexible when you don't have a lot of "'splaining" to do.

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    1. Thanks, Beth! I'm so glad you enjoyed it. And what a good point!

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  5. Don't tell anyone is good advice that I follow, too. Except maybe for hubby and even then I like to surprise him. I have learned a lot about writing, in particular Heartwarming books, by reading other Heartwarming authors. For me, writing is an ongoing process...always learning and trying to do better. Very interesting post Elizabeth and a lovely excerpt.

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    1. So true, Janice. I hope to keep learning and improving too. The longer I'm married the harder it is to genuinely surprise my husband. But if I can manage it, it sure is fun:-)

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  6. I like your list of tips. A business advisor I knew said Jan 1 goals were important, but Labor Day goals were more even more powerful--that back to school feeling never leaves us. We're conditioned to its fresh start. He also believed in five year goals and claimed we usually met them sooner. Seemed to work--I think of that often. Thanks!

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    1. I can believe that about the back to school feeling. I certainly have it. I worked in higher ed for years and did feel an excitement leading up to the beginning of school. I think students' energy can be contagious in a great way. I like the idea about Labor Day goals!

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    2. This struck a chord with me! I love back-to-school. The latest gel pens, the stacks of paper, the binders with pockets and zippers galore, the shoes, the newness and yes, the dreams. As a writer, there's a settling in after the light and busyness of summer.

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  7. I put up sticky notes on the bathroom mirror and in the bedroom as a kind of vision board. And you're right about not always sharing your goals. My mom, with the best of loving intentions, always tried to keep her kids' feet on the ground. I think it's because she hated to see us disappointed, but I think we're more disappointed by the things we never try. She didn't think being a writer was realistic, but now I have 25 books published, another in edits, and yet another being written. I believe in dreaming big, and if something doesn't work out, that's okay. I have plenty more dreams to work toward.

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    1. Yes, and doesn't working toward a dream something give us something to look forward to? I'm always looking for my big and little carrots to keep me going and keep me happy. :-)

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